SAW XI
AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY XIII
By Monique Alexandra Ryan
A Haitian radio plays in the background
A game of musical chairs simple enough
8 chairs are placed while 7 children strategies nearby
A record in the distance is being decided on
The musical score
Necessary to set the tone
Picked & placed on the player
The needle nestles in the grooves
As the scratching gives way to speakers blaring
The whispers begin to drown out the sound
Of the argument about to take place
Slowly the beat takes over
As the song ends the wheels above spin
The party's just begun
The cake
Not eaten
The children
Unsat
The party's just begun
The cake
Not eaten
The children
Unsat
A montage of events
A rollerskating rink is upstairs with the adults engaged in a party
TI's 90's movie is getting a sequel
A group of TDE artists are lending their vocal talents to the soundtrack
Laying down a recording
Live
Local artists on the label are in the building along with other
Elite Members
Some on various recording contract stages
Frozen in time
Mix Tape
Album
Tour
Publicity
Mainstream
House Hold Name
A rollerskating rink is upstairs with the adults engaged in a party
TI's 90's movie is getting a sequel
A group of TDE artists are lending their vocal talents to the soundtrack
Laying down a recording
Live
Local artists on the label are in the building along with other
Elite Members
Some on various recording contract stages
Frozen in time
Mix Tape
Album
Tour
Publicity
Mainstream
House Hold Name
A dozen sound stages all rolling at the same second
Ike and Tina locked in that battle
As Dame bursts into that meeting
With Sean John introducing us to his transsexual
Ike and Tina locked in that battle
As Dame bursts into that meeting
With Sean John introducing us to his transsexual
Music begins to fade
Lauren gets her chain snatched
Some things never change
Lauren gets her chain snatched
Some things never change
"There were only 8 chairs"
"Should we play now"
"I was going to sit there"
They re-looked
There are only 6 chairs
The other one is in the corner
The winner's circle
One was
Missing
For the missing in reality
That POW chair
You know the one that sits lonely with a rose and place setting
It was all ready decorated
"Should we play now"
"I was going to sit there"
They re-looked
There are only 6 chairs
The other one is in the corner
The winner's circle
One was
Missing
For the missing in reality
That POW chair
You know the one that sits lonely with a rose and place setting
It was all ready decorated
They could hear the click of the record player
Anticipating the next re-cord
The clicking from above
When would 'they' decide
Record
Mix & Master
The children might not be the same
They had figured they were able
Lucky
Smarter than the rest
Now
Wondering why they just didn't sit down
They had
LOST
The record
Smashed
Leaving gasps, shocks and an expression of fear
The klaxon sounded
For the start
Lumberjack Games
Anticipating the next re-cord
The clicking from above
When would 'they' decide
Record
Mix & Master
The children might not be the same
They had figured they were able
Lucky
Smarter than the rest
Now
Wondering why they just didn't sit down
They had
LOST
The record
Smashed
Leaving gasps, shocks and an expression of fear
The klaxon sounded
For the start
Lumberjack Games
8 Burly Men
Blindfolded
Left alone in their wilderness
Tasked with nursing a stump back to full health
This Is
Tree From Trunk
Blindfolded
Left alone in their wilderness
Tasked with nursing a stump back to full health
This Is
Tree From Trunk
l hear it's like a reverse Mafia
Endless water
Don't break a record
Don't fuck with a record player
If you don't know how to work it
Don't mess with a person's record collection
Don't mess with that tree that fell in the forest
or on second thought fix it
Endless water
Don't break a record
Don't fuck with a record player
If you don't know how to work it
Don't mess with a person's record collection
Don't mess with that tree that fell in the forest
or on second thought fix it
This Season
The Show You Don't Want To Miss
The Show You Don't Want To Miss
She grabbed another skeleton key and stone to attach
"Are you trying to make a necklace with that?"
She looked behind her, not noticing she had company
Her daughter had walked in and noticed her new shipment
Skeleton keys, stones and jewelry pieces
It was her latest idea, under pressure she would thrive & shine
"Yes, what do you think?"
She held the pieces she had already made up to her daughters neck
Holding a mirror so she could see
"Wow, that's beautiful, so sparkly!"
"Thank you, I think the keys add a special touch."
"I agree."
She had made 6 so far with various stones each with 30 large keys
They belonged to abandoned asylums her family owned the land to
Now that she had shut them down the keys should be used for beauty
The antique quality to the pieces meant she wasn't ready to part with them
I suspect it wouldn't be sold for generations if ever
She made it for herself just in case she needed to get back into the Asylum
Her daughter could keep the precious gems
To be tired is one thing
but this manipulation of the language
right before my very eyes
is just a sickly excuse.
An obsolete way
of dealing with a glaring mistake.
This is a disease,
the way D is so at ease in his own tongue.
A broken down terminology
of the way we say everyday slang,
no flaws in sight yet
I'd love to look into the spine of the book in history
of which we speak.
I'd venture to imagine
it isn't full of any cracks,
rich in every detail and phrase.
You could spend years and many degrees gaining sound mind,
arranged facts,
agreements on who and why meaning garnered what.
Having a sense of cool,
so sure I guess you can call me full-
[She took her seat in class. Davone had called her crazy one too many times and regardless of the law assignment she was given, she felt flipping the etymology was the perfect moment to explain to him, the class, the world: she didn't like what she saw in the language anymore. It was now centered around him. He had become a focal point. It seemed the square root from the combination of the names he had chosen meant all words gravitationally centered around him. She tried for years not to see it. To imagine something else. Fictitiously, anyone else but it was impossible. Law school was her last vestige of peace. She would change the laws and see what difference that would make to the lives of those around her. They flaunted without care how unjust they were so she would finally do something about it...]
An alarm went off
Medication time on the psych ward where she was in 4 point restraints, getting stuck with a syringe. The walls a pale white with stains that dripped down from the ceiling, revealing the screws missing from the fixtures. The walls, windows and baseboards covered in stains that dripped forever frozen in time creating a sense of urgency long forgotten yet hard to miss.
She had just come to from a dream where she heard rhythmic drums playing.
"Where am I?" she said through parched lips.
Her eyes strained to make out the light from the room and the crust blocking the vision in her eyes as she tried and failed to wipe them, hearing the bed frame metal clash with her wrists.
"ouch"
She said softly to herself somewhat noticing her predicament but not understanding why.
"CUT"
He sat in his directors chair ready to frame the next shot
They all waited
The streets were filled with extras cued from 107th to 93rd
To film the current scenes
He could see them all on the monitors but he was focused on her
The 93rd street girl
Her hair was a dark chestnut black, eyes brown
The forms all said the same
Lies
They made up these stories about her
Something about not being resilient
She had gone out of her mind
She was psychotic
Dangerous to herself
Others
Threatening
Hadn't been thinking clearly
Either way she had wound up in their care
Brute force might have taken everything from her in moments
However finding herself with the truth
Reality could help
"Excuse me, can you do me a favor?"
"What?"
"Can you tell me if a website exists called..."
She rattled off her own & to her surprise he checked and said it did
If she could create her own story
Get information out that she knew existed
Did it matter if they kept her captive
They fed her drugs as if it were her food
She preferred the natural approach
No medications but that wasn't an option and if she wanted to get out
Out of restraints, taking medications, especially by injections
She would need to start taking them & doing what they said
The forms all said the same
Lies
They made up these stories about her
Something about not being resilient
She had gone out of her mind
She was psychotic
Dangerous to herself
Others
Threatening
Hadn't been thinking clearly
Either way she had wound up in their care
Brute force might have taken everything from her in moments
However finding herself with the truth
Reality could help
"Excuse me, can you do me a favor?"
"What?"
"Can you tell me if a website exists called..."
She rattled off her own & to her surprise he checked and said it did
If she could create her own story
Get information out that she knew existed
Did it matter if they kept her captive
They fed her drugs as if it were her food
She preferred the natural approach
No medications but that wasn't an option and if she wanted to get out
Out of restraints, taking medications, especially by injections
She would need to start taking them & doing what they said
What do you do when your light body is awakened?
I felt it in the bathroom looking in the mirror
The sensation of a spaceship
Taking off and without a suit or being prepared
Jetting off into the sky
I remember weightlessness but everything coming with me
Then later laying in bed
The idea of the ceiling detaching
The sky pushing me into the universe
As I thought how & why this gift was bestowed upon me
The mechanism & its mathematical components
Having levitated in my dreams many times I wondered if it was the same
Feeling
Second hand nature
Purpose
Meditation was my first key
A true gift to unlocking the wisdom within
I wasn't one of the astral projectors but I was aware of how to
Present myself in dream worlds
Communicating my capabilities & demonstrating them at will
I felt it in the bathroom looking in the mirror
The sensation of a spaceship
Taking off and without a suit or being prepared
Jetting off into the sky
I remember weightlessness but everything coming with me
Then later laying in bed
The idea of the ceiling detaching
The sky pushing me into the universe
As I thought how & why this gift was bestowed upon me
The mechanism & its mathematical components
Having levitated in my dreams many times I wondered if it was the same
Feeling
Second hand nature
Purpose
Meditation was my first key
A true gift to unlocking the wisdom within
I wasn't one of the astral projectors but I was aware of how to
Present myself in dream worlds
Communicating my capabilities & demonstrating them at will
I had watched him
Noticed the intricacies
Nuances
Speaking through the way you move
Walked with that particular lean
You showed us all
So why am I to blame
If I picked up some of your
Particular slang
You said
Urgh
Then ridiculed shouting lies as well as profane remarks
My eyes darted left
Closing chapter, verse and prose
Woes
Wishing that was the end
Bend
To every whim & desire
For me I had learned something new
This peak into a world was brand new
What would I gain from this clever insight?
If not answering his call why not peak in the doors
If not both then perhaps stop and gawk
There was plenty to see & more to acquire
In the knowledge sense which is hardly ever thought about
My quenched thirst of inner workings barely ever satiated
Now anticipating, down right begging me to take a chance
Stop for once
Do something that could bring you happiness
The mere thought brings butterflies
Inner working caressing the souls fingertips bringing pleasure
Never known yet felt on lovers blushed upper eyelids when they smile
Wide
Words congregate around them
Language swims within the minds of men like children playing in pools
I long to lounge in the essence of what it means to be within the universe
of God
Noticed the intricacies
Nuances
Speaking through the way you move
Walked with that particular lean
You showed us all
So why am I to blame
If I picked up some of your
Particular slang
You said
Urgh
Then ridiculed shouting lies as well as profane remarks
My eyes darted left
Closing chapter, verse and prose
Woes
Wishing that was the end
Bend
To every whim & desire
For me I had learned something new
This peak into a world was brand new
What would I gain from this clever insight?
If not answering his call why not peak in the doors
If not both then perhaps stop and gawk
There was plenty to see & more to acquire
In the knowledge sense which is hardly ever thought about
My quenched thirst of inner workings barely ever satiated
Now anticipating, down right begging me to take a chance
Stop for once
Do something that could bring you happiness
The mere thought brings butterflies
Inner working caressing the souls fingertips bringing pleasure
Never known yet felt on lovers blushed upper eyelids when they smile
Wide
Words congregate around them
Language swims within the minds of men like children playing in pools
I long to lounge in the essence of what it means to be within the universe
of God
Time stopped
The measure of the mathematical equation equaling being there
Philosophical minds present
At hand
Behold to witness
The measure of the mathematical equation equaling being there
Philosophical minds present
At hand
Behold to witness
She could play the weather like a sport with the best of them
Spain in the early 80's
Missing that plane crash was a God send
The 90's was easily all NYC, the best years until '99
Skiing down park avenue that one year will always be remembered
Then came Hawaii with is cool fragrant breezes and Manoa drizzles
Clockwork
Couldn't resist her in the 2000's
Too bad
She was gone
A blip in the radar every now and then but to say she did this
Or that could be foretelling
Shadow-casting
I heard once someone ask her to tempt the fates
Cause a storm to decimate
She wouldn't dare but lately
She's set her sights inland
Creating snow where it shouldn't be
Temperature forecasts that haven't charted in the almanac
Thinking why not
Oceans be damned
Grow
Here
She wants swells to swim forth
She'll treat you right
Lay the pipes down flat
No bursting here
Swimmin's fine
Tread High
Forget about being land locked
Now if you're worried about clouds
She'll just smile
Look out the corner of her eye & in no time they'll be gone
She sat down
Ready to get started for her first round of high stakes gambling
Placing $100,000 dollars on the table she said
"Navada August a cool 98 degrees"
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I was getting better and better every day
Out of restraints
Walking the ward
Filling in my menu
I asked the doctor for 2x the salad and snacks which meant I got a lot
The snacks were fresh, organic & wholesome
Afterall I was in San Mateo California
The land of avacado toast and California burgers
Out of restraints
Walking the ward
Filling in my menu
I asked the doctor for 2x the salad and snacks which meant I got a lot
The snacks were fresh, organic & wholesome
Afterall I was in San Mateo California
The land of avacado toast and California burgers
|
|
2 snacks then breakfast, lunch and dinner
Clockwork
Clockwork
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I remembered the 80's
How normal it was seeing aliens on TV
How I looked at the two that would visit me as an invasion
I would see them creep into the room
I wouldn't hear the front door only the bedroom as it opened
The two of them as they came one after the other
I was too young to figure out their intentions but not the fact
They were alien
Not flesh like you and me which is why I sought the television to help
Pinpoint where I could gather information on their origin
My Mother was no assistance
She acted as their usher to my presence
She alerted me to them at that late hour
Always the night time
Pitch black
They would awaken my flesh
The top of my head is what they were curious about touching
That is all I could recall
How normal it was seeing aliens on TV
How I looked at the two that would visit me as an invasion
I would see them creep into the room
I wouldn't hear the front door only the bedroom as it opened
The two of them as they came one after the other
I was too young to figure out their intentions but not the fact
They were alien
Not flesh like you and me which is why I sought the television to help
Pinpoint where I could gather information on their origin
My Mother was no assistance
She acted as their usher to my presence
She alerted me to them at that late hour
Always the night time
Pitch black
They would awaken my flesh
The top of my head is what they were curious about touching
That is all I could recall
|
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I'll be able to go home soon
Good thing I've been doing what they say and taking their medications
Good thing I've been doing what they say and taking their medications
|
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Filling out the menu every afternoon has become my meditation
I enjoy finding out what my 'special' lunch or dinner meal will be
Breakfast is usually the same ideas I have in my head whereas with
The afternoon and evenings my imagination tends to run wild
I like the routine of sitting down with the others
The act of gaining utensils when they consider I am no longer a danger
The exploration my mouth takes when I experience new flavors
Combinations, sensations and explorations on my tongue
This mental health journey isnt for the faint of heart but if you find
51/50 voluntary in your future I recommend the menu options for double
Enjoy the salad and fruit
The snack is plentiful before bedtime so indulge
I enjoy finding out what my 'special' lunch or dinner meal will be
Breakfast is usually the same ideas I have in my head whereas with
The afternoon and evenings my imagination tends to run wild
I like the routine of sitting down with the others
The act of gaining utensils when they consider I am no longer a danger
The exploration my mouth takes when I experience new flavors
Combinations, sensations and explorations on my tongue
This mental health journey isnt for the faint of heart but if you find
51/50 voluntary in your future I recommend the menu options for double
Enjoy the salad and fruit
The snack is plentiful before bedtime so indulge
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Discharge is today
D is charging me full price for my items
I used his magical discount of buying all of his albums
Didn't work
Wonder if he knows Milton Bradley because that guy got me
Sold a ton of luxury real estate I didn't want or need
Sitting in a Bradley thinking
I'm safe with a ton in the bank
Fortified inside
Sitting pretty with my mill
Wish he could back up his life
It's obsolete
Get a new game and playing cards
His thing is for jokers
Tokers
Casual affair spenders
Not the serious or the spend thrifts
Sift
In the bin of de jour
Life
Not a game to be played
In the end
I'm walking away with the mint
Daffodils hear me squint
I used his magical discount of buying all of his albums
Didn't work
Wonder if he knows Milton Bradley because that guy got me
Sold a ton of luxury real estate I didn't want or need
Sitting in a Bradley thinking
I'm safe with a ton in the bank
Fortified inside
Sitting pretty with my mill
Wish he could back up his life
It's obsolete
Get a new game and playing cards
His thing is for jokers
Tokers
Casual affair spenders
Not the serious or the spend thrifts
Sift
In the bin of de jour
Life
Not a game to be played
In the end
I'm walking away with the mint
Daffodils hear me squint
"Get off the fucking bus"
I was excited my first day of basic training
Meeting what it means to be face to face with a Drill Sgt
I was casually on a bus having flown from Germany via England
Transferred, along with 60-100, on white busses
Ft. Jackson
I knew nothing of South Carolina or the animosity I would face
I had developed a British accent having married one, living there for
3 years
My only advice given by my friends
"Lay low, don't get noticed"
Arrival wasn't a shock to me it was the immediate feeling of
"Fuck you" from them to us
What did I do
I hustled off the bus with my duffel in hand keeping up with everyone
Figuring I was the oldest
Immediately tried to get in line where I saw Drill Sgt after Drill Sgt
I was pushed out of the way, tried arguing then felt it better to just
Move to another line
I stood waiting
Prepared for anything
We followed our Drill Sgt to a clearing where he had us line up in 4 rows
Next thing I heard made me smile
I had seen it in movies, prepared for it at home in England
My then husband took me out on runs
"Half left face"
I knew what was coming
The push up
I wanted to see what I was made of, how many I could do
Would I be tested immediately
We all got into position
Some needing help
Then it began
The slow process of working as a unit
Getting the form correct
Doing 1 which really only equaled a 1/2 of 1
It wasn't easy but it was a steady pace and I felt a rhythm
A coordination I had never been a part of before
Just as I'm synced in
From the back of the row I hear
"How many more do we have to do Drill Sgt?"
Now I know enough not to ask a question like that especially with
Punishment
I wanted to personally find out who it was in that second and talk to them
Find out their personal motivation
It was probably nearly over but now
Based on her particular question she was what they deem
"Keep going"
Frankly I was angry
There was no answering her question
There was no dealing with body fat
From that moment on
Our platoon was always in the front lean of rest position
Running to & from post
Working out, in shape, doing 100's of reps
I guess I owe her a thanks now that I think about it &
The one who shoved me out of the first line
I loved the experience I had with the Drill Sgt that chose to train me
Sure I was teased about my accent and asked about tea with scones
I was interrogated as to why I hadn't joined the Royal Army
After explanations with NYC paperwork
Everyone can see why I joined, fought for & served my country
I was excited my first day of basic training
Meeting what it means to be face to face with a Drill Sgt
I was casually on a bus having flown from Germany via England
Transferred, along with 60-100, on white busses
Ft. Jackson
I knew nothing of South Carolina or the animosity I would face
I had developed a British accent having married one, living there for
3 years
My only advice given by my friends
"Lay low, don't get noticed"
Arrival wasn't a shock to me it was the immediate feeling of
"Fuck you" from them to us
What did I do
I hustled off the bus with my duffel in hand keeping up with everyone
Figuring I was the oldest
Immediately tried to get in line where I saw Drill Sgt after Drill Sgt
I was pushed out of the way, tried arguing then felt it better to just
Move to another line
I stood waiting
Prepared for anything
We followed our Drill Sgt to a clearing where he had us line up in 4 rows
Next thing I heard made me smile
I had seen it in movies, prepared for it at home in England
My then husband took me out on runs
"Half left face"
I knew what was coming
The push up
I wanted to see what I was made of, how many I could do
Would I be tested immediately
We all got into position
Some needing help
Then it began
The slow process of working as a unit
Getting the form correct
Doing 1 which really only equaled a 1/2 of 1
It wasn't easy but it was a steady pace and I felt a rhythm
A coordination I had never been a part of before
Just as I'm synced in
From the back of the row I hear
"How many more do we have to do Drill Sgt?"
Now I know enough not to ask a question like that especially with
Punishment
I wanted to personally find out who it was in that second and talk to them
Find out their personal motivation
It was probably nearly over but now
Based on her particular question she was what they deem
"Keep going"
Frankly I was angry
There was no answering her question
There was no dealing with body fat
From that moment on
Our platoon was always in the front lean of rest position
Running to & from post
Working out, in shape, doing 100's of reps
I guess I owe her a thanks now that I think about it &
The one who shoved me out of the first line
I loved the experience I had with the Drill Sgt that chose to train me
Sure I was teased about my accent and asked about tea with scones
I was interrogated as to why I hadn't joined the Royal Army
After explanations with NYC paperwork
Everyone can see why I joined, fought for & served my country
|
Get out
Depart Leave This unholy Union This forsaken moment In time I long to be Cherished Wanted Loved Touched If but for that tender Gaze Then for the eternity I present to you This warm embrace I feel your thigh The throb inside My favorite I cannot hide |
|
One spin
Was all it was supposed to be
He was going to stop for a second
His Father had said
"That sounds like a nightmare Son"
It was advertised
Find your Planet that loves you
Earth
Take 1 trip around
When he got in line
The smile faded
"This could last until eternity" said the entity behind him
He had never seen a winged creature especially a red one
He felt out of his depth, terrain
Maybe he should go back home
To the confines of his kingdom
Heaven
That had been his 'Earth'
He heard chatter up front
"What could it hurt"
"How long could it take"
Although he had been strongly advised against it
Who would recognize him here
Uh Oh
He noticed one closer to the entrance
Not going in
Near
Casually
Chatting
In
The winner's circle
A chance to meet & greet
Water
The previous 1st years champion
It had gone & fallen in love
He read of their adventure
Had sipped from it
Asking permission with his spiritual elder
The healing work encountered between the two
Earth with Water
Remarkable
They were a story of triumph with unexpected fortune
The skin quenched with the thirst of a thousand hungry mouths
Raindrops
On rosy skin
Pores drink in
The various uniqueness that is this water substance in droplet form
Pervasive
Devouring the essential organs that make up the me before you
Mid drops
Awkwardly pausing as I do
Foyers spent
Rearranged
Home is just a place not only a memory
A droplet on the skin that breathes in
Freckled, the distance, my DNA
You may say
As you slide down my collarbone, neck, arm and hip
I may wipe you delicately and with a care that leaves not even the slightest Trace
Except deep inside
I'm out
Broken free
From the binds that seek to reign me in
Nocturnally set
I am roaming this and every night
Of your mind
Raindrops
On rosy skin
Pores drink in
The various uniqueness that is this water substance in droplet form
Pervasive
Devouring the essential organs that make up the me before you
Mid drops
Awkwardly pausing as I do
Foyers spent
Rearranged
Home is just a place not only a memory
A droplet on the skin that breathes in
Freckled, the distance, my DNA
You may say
As you slide down my collarbone, neck, arm and hip
I may wipe you delicately and with a care that leaves not even the slightest Trace
Except deep inside
I'm out
Broken free
From the binds that seek to reign me in
Nocturnally set
I am roaming this and every night
Of your mind
I finally did it!
CLEARED
Wonder what flag will be chosen next...
Wonder what flag will be chosen next...
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"& our next competitor with this beautiful submission"
"This is
Tree From Trunk
Everything you've been longing for in the regenerative field"
Tree From Trunk
Everything you've been longing for in the regenerative field"
"Another beautiful entry..."
