|
Poetry from 9th grade - 2013
|
A
Aloha
Time flies
As the clouds go by
The sun is shining in my eyes
And I'm just a little high
Wondering why
The time flies by
Time flies
As the clouds go by
The sun is shining in my eyes
And I'm just a little high
Wondering why
The time flies by
AM
The morning light awakes
Birds sing
I open my eyes and the rays kiss my face
Lighting the corners of my mind
It's a whole new time
For me to be alive
As I smile and close my eyes
The worlds reborn
Relaxing is a whole new term to me
Who could have seen?
What does all of this mean?
I wipe the tears from my eyes
Relax
Stay awhile
It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life for me
And I'm feeling free
Was it all just a dream
I could have seen
The sun
Bright and shining
Gleaming
In the bed under the covers
Ensconced in the light
It's the morning and I've got nothing but time
The morning light awakes
Birds sing
I open my eyes and the rays kiss my face
Lighting the corners of my mind
It's a whole new time
For me to be alive
As I smile and close my eyes
The worlds reborn
Relaxing is a whole new term to me
Who could have seen?
What does all of this mean?
I wipe the tears from my eyes
Relax
Stay awhile
It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life for me
And I'm feeling free
Was it all just a dream
I could have seen
The sun
Bright and shining
Gleaming
In the bed under the covers
Ensconced in the light
It's the morning and I've got nothing but time
Are All Men Like This
They say they want to get to know you
They claim to be so true
But why is it that all they want
Is to fuck with you
They play endless mind games
And constantly mess with your head
All of this just to get you in bed
Well I'm sick
And I'm tired
And I wish they would stop
Because I'm not some rag doll
That you can carry around you like a mop
I will no longer soak up your sweat
And wipe away your tears
I will not share in your laughter
And wash away your fears
I've had it
I'm done
Now what's to come
I'm all alone and kind of scared
But you know what
I don't care
I've sworn off all men
I've had it with them
So beware all of you women
They are all the same
They are only low-down dirty men
But if you doubt what I say is true
You pick a man and change my view
Show me the good instead of the bad
Show me he loves you and never makes you sad
Give me a reason to change my mind
Find me a guy that will definitely be all mine
Mind, body, heart & soul
These are the things that will make him whole
They say they want to get to know you
They claim to be so true
But why is it that all they want
Is to fuck with you
They play endless mind games
And constantly mess with your head
All of this just to get you in bed
Well I'm sick
And I'm tired
And I wish they would stop
Because I'm not some rag doll
That you can carry around you like a mop
I will no longer soak up your sweat
And wipe away your tears
I will not share in your laughter
And wash away your fears
I've had it
I'm done
Now what's to come
I'm all alone and kind of scared
But you know what
I don't care
I've sworn off all men
I've had it with them
So beware all of you women
They are all the same
They are only low-down dirty men
But if you doubt what I say is true
You pick a man and change my view
Show me the good instead of the bad
Show me he loves you and never makes you sad
Give me a reason to change my mind
Find me a guy that will definitely be all mine
Mind, body, heart & soul
These are the things that will make him whole
B
Baybie
Cute
Cuddly
Warm & sweet
They really are a precious treat
Natures way of blessing you
For all of the wonderful things you do
You see yourself in their eyes & hear your voices when they sigh
Their smiles really do light up your life
So hug them
Squeeze them
Never let them go because before you know it they're rarrin' to go
Cute
Cuddly
Warm & sweet
They really are a precious treat
Natures way of blessing you
For all of the wonderful things you do
You see yourself in their eyes & hear your voices when they sigh
Their smiles really do light up your life
So hug them
Squeeze them
Never let them go because before you know it they're rarrin' to go
Bells Chime*
As I wander alone in the mountains frolicking among the flowers bathing in the river
My glasses reflect a time when I used to be as rigid as a rock
Endlessly climbing the highest pole
Home is no longer a place and I'm dancing in the moonlight
As I wander alone in the mountains frolicking among the flowers bathing in the river
My glasses reflect a time when I used to be as rigid as a rock
Endlessly climbing the highest pole
Home is no longer a place and I'm dancing in the moonlight
Blur
Scream
Ouch
Hurt me
You see we are together but so far away
I wish
Oh the melody of tomorrow
Take me away to a place where all is
What can I say
We're all in a dance
Today's your final chance
We will move on together but we will stay forever
I'm in such a daze
Swaying
I just can't take it anymore
The noise
The constant battle
The fight to stay alive
Why is it my time
Scream
Ouch
Hurt me
You see we are together but so far away
I wish
Oh the melody of tomorrow
Take me away to a place where all is
What can I say
We're all in a dance
Today's your final chance
We will move on together but we will stay forever
I'm in such a daze
Swaying
I just can't take it anymore
The noise
The constant battle
The fight to stay alive
Why is it my time
Bond
Sisters seem to share it all
An everlasting bond of joys and sorrows
Weaving in and out threading the existence of their lives spent united as one
Carefully orchestrated units
Etching out the notes of beautiful musical scores
Beating silently in their hearts
Sisters seem to share it all
An everlasting bond of joys and sorrows
Weaving in and out threading the existence of their lives spent united as one
Carefully orchestrated units
Etching out the notes of beautiful musical scores
Beating silently in their hearts
Broken, Damaged & Confused
I could cry a river of tears and it still couldn't covey the level of sadness I feel inside. If you prick me I do bleed and if you crush me I stumble and fall. Will I get back up again...?...maybe...maybe in another form. I'll throw myself into my work, I'll recede inside of myself and ball alone...and if you catch me off guard that instability, loneliness and heartbreak will show and you will truly see how broken I feel and it will overwhelm you. You will look at me and realize there is really nothing you can say or do at that moment to drag me out of this depth of despair. So you ask "are you ok" knowing that I am not...but I thank you for being there anyway.
I could cry a river of tears and it still couldn't covey the level of sadness I feel inside. If you prick me I do bleed and if you crush me I stumble and fall. Will I get back up again...?...maybe...maybe in another form. I'll throw myself into my work, I'll recede inside of myself and ball alone...and if you catch me off guard that instability, loneliness and heartbreak will show and you will truly see how broken I feel and it will overwhelm you. You will look at me and realize there is really nothing you can say or do at that moment to drag me out of this depth of despair. So you ask "are you ok" knowing that I am not...but I thank you for being there anyway.
c
Cheese
His smile
Warms my heart
His smile lights up my life
His smile
In turn makes me smile
His smile
Warms my heart
His smile lights up my life
His smile
In turn makes me smile
Close To You
As I lay
I feel the soft touch of the wind
Wrapping
Caressing
Lingering
Leaving its invisible trace
Kissing my lips
Closing my eyes
Whispering to me
Drawing me near
Making me feel a touch that is real
Strong arms
A quiet little sigh
As I lie awake
Nothing to say
A new day
Rises
Above the beach and the waves
The sun and its' rays
Is it time to play
Do I have to say
That I long for your touch
My heart skips a beat
My breath comes to me
Can't you see
I see the wonders
They captivate me
Come closer and lay
Feel the wind
Do you hear what it says
As I lay
I feel the soft touch of the wind
Wrapping
Caressing
Lingering
Leaving its invisible trace
Kissing my lips
Closing my eyes
Whispering to me
Drawing me near
Making me feel a touch that is real
Strong arms
A quiet little sigh
As I lie awake
Nothing to say
A new day
Rises
Above the beach and the waves
The sun and its' rays
Is it time to play
Do I have to say
That I long for your touch
My heart skips a beat
My breath comes to me
Can't you see
I see the wonders
They captivate me
Come closer and lay
Feel the wind
Do you hear what it says
Collison
Things
People
Aren't what they seem
You have your life to lead
And so do I but if we're on the same path aren't we going to collide
Move as one
The signs say
But what if we want to go our own way
Things
People
Aren't what they seem
You have your life to lead
And so do I but if we're on the same path aren't we going to collide
Move as one
The signs say
But what if we want to go our own way
Crush
Don't really know what to say
I like you
I definitely want you
To know and touch you
And I want you to know me
Inside and out
To feel me
Smell me
And get to know all of the wonders
That make me
Me
Don't really know what to say
I like you
I definitely want you
To know and touch you
And I want you to know me
Inside and out
To feel me
Smell me
And get to know all of the wonders
That make me
Me
D
Detox
Craving celery & apples while shopping in the supermarket.
I instinctively picked up a couple of bundles of celery and 6 apples to juice later.
Craving celery & apples while shopping in the supermarket.
I instinctively picked up a couple of bundles of celery and 6 apples to juice later.
Distant Memory
I close my eyes
Remembering your smile
Feelings of warmth flood my body
It takes my breath away
Making me remember the times
I used to be on your mind
I close my eyes
Remembering your smile
Feelings of warmth flood my body
It takes my breath away
Making me remember the times
I used to be on your mind
E
Emotional
Today I cried
I cried because I'm blue
I cried because I didn't know what to do
I cried for the little girl who longed to be free
I cried for who she was & what she was going to be
But most of all I cried because it was my destiny
Today I cried
I cried because I'm blue
I cried because I didn't know what to do
I cried for the little girl who longed to be free
I cried for who she was & what she was going to be
But most of all I cried because it was my destiny
F
Former Lover
Thinking about you now brings tears to my eyes
As I grin remembering a love that slipped away
My heart remembers the ache
Wishing I had screamed
Yes
My lips remember the fire
And the unspoken passion beating in our hearts
Thinking about you now brings tears to my eyes
As I grin remembering a love that slipped away
My heart remembers the ache
Wishing I had screamed
Yes
My lips remember the fire
And the unspoken passion beating in our hearts
Fuck
Some good
Hot
Sweaty
Nasty
Oh so sexy
What's that word again
Love
Some good
Hot
Sweaty
Nasty
Oh so sexy
What's that word again
Love
G
Google Saves Me Again
Woke up to an empty apartment yet again...I could feel it as soon as my eyes opened. It was as if I was still dreaming...my legs swung out of the comforter and onto the plush carpet below. I reached for the door to survey the background premonition that was lingering in the air. The couch looked perfect with just a trace of the man that slept there only hours ago imprinted on the cream fuzzy pillow. On a whim I wondered if it was possible that he could be waiting for the elevator so I walked toward the door, looking through the peephole and there he stood. I swung the door open and he stood staring back at me.
"I just want to give you your 3 days."
"I didn't' want to wake you"
I tried to process his words through my sleepy haze of disappointment and familiarity...I just woke up naturally...
Woke up to an empty apartment yet again...I could feel it as soon as my eyes opened. It was as if I was still dreaming...my legs swung out of the comforter and onto the plush carpet below. I reached for the door to survey the background premonition that was lingering in the air. The couch looked perfect with just a trace of the man that slept there only hours ago imprinted on the cream fuzzy pillow. On a whim I wondered if it was possible that he could be waiting for the elevator so I walked toward the door, looking through the peephole and there he stood. I swung the door open and he stood staring back at me.
"I just want to give you your 3 days."
"I didn't' want to wake you"
I tried to process his words through my sleepy haze of disappointment and familiarity...I just woke up naturally...
Grumpy Young Woman
Turn me on turn me out make me scream make me shout
Has anyone else noticed how music is just becoming one phrase stated over and over again. I mean don't get me wrong I love Draft Punk etc etc but come on. I should make a song and release it to see if saying the same thing over and over is lucrative. I make up songs all the time anyway....hmmmm...
Watching Wilfred
The truth will set you free but first it will make you miserable...
So true...so true.
This episode rings true as well as everything else I've been watching lately. The fact that Ryan is so adamant about not wanting to hear this so called nonsense; being able to see his love clearly...until Wilford comes along eventually convincing Ryan to go along with playing a pointless game for a prize he doesn't even want.
"I call monchichi clown bubbles!!!"
"Those are serious words"...
...I thought so too...Ryan eventually chooses truth and doesn't feel like he's won...but proceeds to open Pandoras box knowing that he should have trusted his instincts.
Elijah Wood seems to look like a reptile or frog as he explains to her she can't move in and I'm relieved for her since he is putting me off at the moment. I've stumbled upon and seen a few YouTube videos to know that it could be possible...I'm expecting to see one of his eyes blink in a reptilian way when I think that maybe I am envisioning this because I can't understand why he is so afraid of knowing the truth, scared to acknowledge anything is wrong and burying himself further in chaos.
These behaviors are common in my patients... I just wish that people didn't let things fester, tearing them apart, confiding in no one, finally shattering their soul. I'll always be able to help people remember who they truly are but anyone can do it...it just takes compassion, communication and commitment.
...or maybe...
....he really is a reptile....
Turn me on turn me out make me scream make me shout
Has anyone else noticed how music is just becoming one phrase stated over and over again. I mean don't get me wrong I love Draft Punk etc etc but come on. I should make a song and release it to see if saying the same thing over and over is lucrative. I make up songs all the time anyway....hmmmm...
Watching Wilfred
The truth will set you free but first it will make you miserable...
So true...so true.
This episode rings true as well as everything else I've been watching lately. The fact that Ryan is so adamant about not wanting to hear this so called nonsense; being able to see his love clearly...until Wilford comes along eventually convincing Ryan to go along with playing a pointless game for a prize he doesn't even want.
"I call monchichi clown bubbles!!!"
"Those are serious words"...
...I thought so too...Ryan eventually chooses truth and doesn't feel like he's won...but proceeds to open Pandoras box knowing that he should have trusted his instincts.
Elijah Wood seems to look like a reptile or frog as he explains to her she can't move in and I'm relieved for her since he is putting me off at the moment. I've stumbled upon and seen a few YouTube videos to know that it could be possible...I'm expecting to see one of his eyes blink in a reptilian way when I think that maybe I am envisioning this because I can't understand why he is so afraid of knowing the truth, scared to acknowledge anything is wrong and burying himself further in chaos.
These behaviors are common in my patients... I just wish that people didn't let things fester, tearing them apart, confiding in no one, finally shattering their soul. I'll always be able to help people remember who they truly are but anyone can do it...it just takes compassion, communication and commitment.
...or maybe...
....he really is a reptile....
H
Happy Birthday
You're a shining star
You may not know it but you are
Shooting high up in the sky
Don't believe me
Why ask why
I couldn't even tell a lie
When I first saw you
Daring and bold
Swimming in the water
Your story yet untold
Signs saying stop
Beware
But you
You didn't even care
A quiet sky
Nice & sweet
You really are a special treat
That I couldn't wait to meet
Because you walk to a different beat
You're a shining star
You may not know it but you are
Shooting high up in the sky
Don't believe me
Why ask why
I couldn't even tell a lie
When I first saw you
Daring and bold
Swimming in the water
Your story yet untold
Signs saying stop
Beware
But you
You didn't even care
A quiet sky
Nice & sweet
You really are a special treat
That I couldn't wait to meet
Because you walk to a different beat
How To...urgh!
How do you explain to your boyfriend that you don't want to have sex with him because you feel fat, bloated and ugly when you know that he will just deny it because he's in love with you and wants to bow chicka bow wow you?
I am fat! 85% of my clothes don't fit. This is ridiculous.
How do you explain to your boyfriend that you don't want to have sex with him because you feel fat, bloated and ugly when you know that he will just deny it because he's in love with you and wants to bow chicka bow wow you?
I am fat! 85% of my clothes don't fit. This is ridiculous.
I
I Dedicate This To You
This is dedicated to all of the woman who have loved and lost.
Who have put their all into every inch of it, willingly, lovingly, and with all of their heart and soul.
Here's to those left behind, trampled and trotted on, lied to, abused and used.
May you never forget that you loved and deserve to be loved in return.
This is dedicated to all of the woman who have loved and lost.
Who have put their all into every inch of it, willingly, lovingly, and with all of their heart and soul.
Here's to those left behind, trampled and trotted on, lied to, abused and used.
May you never forget that you loved and deserve to be loved in return.
Inner Dialogue
She took a piece of your soul
People are like puzzle pieces
The pieces are there
You just have to figure out which goes where
Keep it simple
Why are you so afraid
I'm looking for something to love
Because I can smell you smelling me
Linger in her tide pool and mingle in with the reef
She took a piece of your soul
People are like puzzle pieces
The pieces are there
You just have to figure out which goes where
Keep it simple
Why are you so afraid
I'm looking for something to love
Because I can smell you smelling me
Linger in her tide pool and mingle in with the reef
Introduction to Pain
6 weeks 6 days
I hate him. I hate his fucking guts. The way he treated me like shit on the bottom of his shoe. No. Worse than that because he would have carefully discarded it and placed it into the proper receptacle. Not like the way he treated my heart and soul, stomping on it every chance he got. All I wanted to do was love him. All I ever did was love him and I really didn't deserve what he did. Especially not the situation I currently find myself in. I don't see a way out of this mess. Drowning in my hatred and disgust for him I don't know how to snap out. I wish I never met him. Took that detour, crossing over into unknown territory. Having gone down the road I now see that it left me stranded, alone and deserted. No one to call for help and no way out.
I hate his bearded face.
His crusted lips.
The ugly diamond argyle sweater he thinks is fancy when every time I see him in it it makes me puke a little in my mouth.
I hate the way he rubbed my belly willing a baby inside.
I hate the way he fucked me so good I'm not sure anyone will ever be able to compare.
He used to nestle his mouth between the folds of my pussy and linger, taking deep licks, consuming me whole. It was his favorite thing to do and I loved it. Urgh...I hate him!
6 weeks 6 days
I hate him. I hate his fucking guts. The way he treated me like shit on the bottom of his shoe. No. Worse than that because he would have carefully discarded it and placed it into the proper receptacle. Not like the way he treated my heart and soul, stomping on it every chance he got. All I wanted to do was love him. All I ever did was love him and I really didn't deserve what he did. Especially not the situation I currently find myself in. I don't see a way out of this mess. Drowning in my hatred and disgust for him I don't know how to snap out. I wish I never met him. Took that detour, crossing over into unknown territory. Having gone down the road I now see that it left me stranded, alone and deserted. No one to call for help and no way out.
I hate his bearded face.
His crusted lips.
The ugly diamond argyle sweater he thinks is fancy when every time I see him in it it makes me puke a little in my mouth.
I hate the way he rubbed my belly willing a baby inside.
I hate the way he fucked me so good I'm not sure anyone will ever be able to compare.
He used to nestle his mouth between the folds of my pussy and linger, taking deep licks, consuming me whole. It was his favorite thing to do and I loved it. Urgh...I hate him!
K
Kink
Oh how the mind rambles at the very mentioning of the term
For you
It is what this is
For me
It is the essence of who I am
Kink
Rolls off the tongue and out of my lips
Kink
Makes my pussy wet every time that I speak it
Kink
Oh how the mind rambles at the very mentioning of the term
For you
It is what this is
For me
It is the essence of who I am
Kink
Rolls off the tongue and out of my lips
Kink
Makes my pussy wet every time that I speak it
Kink
L
Love
What is love?
Desperate hopes of satisfaction cradled in the endless summers of my discontent and need-
I need people
Love
Support
Honor
But I want acceptance and down right laughter
To cry when I feel wonderful joy and relentless heartache
Suffering from the sadness in my life
I wander alone
I'm tired and cold
I need someone
If only for a minute
Day
Lifetime
I dream of a time when darkness turns into everlasting light shining down on me
Shading my face from the fear inside
I'm trying to hide from the world
The shadowless figures attempting relentlessly to steal my soul
Slam
Bang
Hate
Each and everyday I watch
Cowered
Scared to even make a sound
Disrupting the flow of your life rushing like a river
Ready to overcome the boundaries left behind
What I want is easy
What I need seems impossible
Heartbroken victim meets a warrior of a different time
Both survivors but of another kind
Step by step
Day by day
What is love?
Desperate hopes of satisfaction cradled in the endless summers of my discontent and need-
I need people
Love
Support
Honor
But I want acceptance and down right laughter
To cry when I feel wonderful joy and relentless heartache
Suffering from the sadness in my life
I wander alone
I'm tired and cold
I need someone
If only for a minute
Day
Lifetime
I dream of a time when darkness turns into everlasting light shining down on me
Shading my face from the fear inside
I'm trying to hide from the world
The shadowless figures attempting relentlessly to steal my soul
Slam
Bang
Hate
Each and everyday I watch
Cowered
Scared to even make a sound
Disrupting the flow of your life rushing like a river
Ready to overcome the boundaries left behind
What I want is easy
What I need seems impossible
Heartbroken victim meets a warrior of a different time
Both survivors but of another kind
Step by step
Day by day
Love Is...
Love is wonderful
Love is real
Love is something I wish I could feel
It makes you cry tears of joy
It makes you weep when there's no more
It makes you lost
It makes you free
Love is definitely inside of me
Waiting
Hoping
Wondering
Will anyone see me
Love is wonderful
Love is real
Love is something I wish I could feel
It makes you cry tears of joy
It makes you weep when there's no more
It makes you lost
It makes you free
Love is definitely inside of me
Waiting
Hoping
Wondering
Will anyone see me
M
Make Yourself A Priority Instead of an Option
I know this but I still miss him but what exactly do I miss. I don't miss the constant walking away, the fighting or the angry words. I miss the companion, the friend, the lover. I miss the intimate moments shared, the endless smiles, gazes, phone calls, the excitement had and the orgasms given. I don't miss the tears shed, lonely nights and broken hearts. I don't miss the accusations, pitchfork wielding and silence. I miss the love but I don't miss the tearing the love from my arms. I miss the friendship but I don't miss the endless barrage of finger pointing. I hate this. I hate what we have become. I need to set you free and it brings tears to my eyes and sadness to my heart. I loved you. I love you. I miss you but realize that I never really had you. I was the expendable one. You never let me forget that. You were my priority, my world, my everything. I wanted so badly to make it work, to make you see and believe that it only drove you further away. I'm lost in a river of sadness and regret. I'm drowning in sorrow. What becomes of the broken hearted...?
So I sent this to him as an email and no response. I deleted his number but remembered that I had a voicemail from him. I sent him a text against my better judgment basically asking why...no response. Urgh! I know that we can't be together, I know that this is toxic for the both of us I'm just so lost and confused when I gave him everything he wanted. I attempted to remove every barrier that he said was a hindrance and it changed us for the worse. I wanted to give us the chance that I knew he deserved. To express my love for him it had to be met with the action of being available and I'm happy I put my all into it but confused as to when it will finally be my turn to be happily ever after.
I'm scared this will be the thing that drives me over the edge and I pray for an end.
I know this but I still miss him but what exactly do I miss. I don't miss the constant walking away, the fighting or the angry words. I miss the companion, the friend, the lover. I miss the intimate moments shared, the endless smiles, gazes, phone calls, the excitement had and the orgasms given. I don't miss the tears shed, lonely nights and broken hearts. I don't miss the accusations, pitchfork wielding and silence. I miss the love but I don't miss the tearing the love from my arms. I miss the friendship but I don't miss the endless barrage of finger pointing. I hate this. I hate what we have become. I need to set you free and it brings tears to my eyes and sadness to my heart. I loved you. I love you. I miss you but realize that I never really had you. I was the expendable one. You never let me forget that. You were my priority, my world, my everything. I wanted so badly to make it work, to make you see and believe that it only drove you further away. I'm lost in a river of sadness and regret. I'm drowning in sorrow. What becomes of the broken hearted...?
So I sent this to him as an email and no response. I deleted his number but remembered that I had a voicemail from him. I sent him a text against my better judgment basically asking why...no response. Urgh! I know that we can't be together, I know that this is toxic for the both of us I'm just so lost and confused when I gave him everything he wanted. I attempted to remove every barrier that he said was a hindrance and it changed us for the worse. I wanted to give us the chance that I knew he deserved. To express my love for him it had to be met with the action of being available and I'm happy I put my all into it but confused as to when it will finally be my turn to be happily ever after.
I'm scared this will be the thing that drives me over the edge and I pray for an end.
Missing You
Thinking of him...love springs to mind and I would usually text or call him but alas...he is indisposed...
Just put on Doc Hollywood and here's a fact I didn't know about Mr. Fox...his middle name has nothing to do with the J. that has been sandwiched in between my childhood movie stars name...go figure.
"I suspect your version of romance is whatever will separate me from my panties."
Maybe that's what's missing in our romance department. The kisses on my face, the sniff of my neck, the breathless stares from across the room...the feeling of being not just sexy but beautiful in his eyes. The carnal hunger and drive desperate to be satisfied and quenched. He's been mighty parched lately and my black snake moan has been whispering along. I don't know what exactly caused it or how to restart it. It's probably one of those situations where I need to have it to remind myself how much I love it but not feeling sexy and horny enough to want to do that. When I say "so long" that measurement equates to >1 week and I can't actually remember how many days it's been...no bueno...I would be clawing and writhing on the bed waiting to pounce and drain him.
Küggle-sticks! This simply isn't fair to him since I know what it feels like to have your body ache and ooze sex. It's in the flick of my eye, gloss on my lips, smile on my face and words from my lips. It's in my walk, the way my body sways and shantés, when I push up next to you, kiss your lips and hear you moan. It's like poetry in motion... absolute and quantified...it's a yearning that must be satisfied, a craving left unfulfilled, gnawing at every part of your brain causing...dun dun dah...the zombie affect.
Thinking of him...love springs to mind and I would usually text or call him but alas...he is indisposed...
Just put on Doc Hollywood and here's a fact I didn't know about Mr. Fox...his middle name has nothing to do with the J. that has been sandwiched in between my childhood movie stars name...go figure.
"I suspect your version of romance is whatever will separate me from my panties."
Maybe that's what's missing in our romance department. The kisses on my face, the sniff of my neck, the breathless stares from across the room...the feeling of being not just sexy but beautiful in his eyes. The carnal hunger and drive desperate to be satisfied and quenched. He's been mighty parched lately and my black snake moan has been whispering along. I don't know what exactly caused it or how to restart it. It's probably one of those situations where I need to have it to remind myself how much I love it but not feeling sexy and horny enough to want to do that. When I say "so long" that measurement equates to >1 week and I can't actually remember how many days it's been...no bueno...I would be clawing and writhing on the bed waiting to pounce and drain him.
Küggle-sticks! This simply isn't fair to him since I know what it feels like to have your body ache and ooze sex. It's in the flick of my eye, gloss on my lips, smile on my face and words from my lips. It's in my walk, the way my body sways and shantés, when I push up next to you, kiss your lips and hear you moan. It's like poetry in motion... absolute and quantified...it's a yearning that must be satisfied, a craving left unfulfilled, gnawing at every part of your brain causing...dun dun dah...the zombie affect.
BEAR SPICING IT UP AS RAFFI
I'm sorry...I should just jump right in. I know that's the cure. If you were here right now....
I have noticed a common theme with the women in these movies...they are fed up with the bullshit of having been lied to, left broken hearted and alone to deal with the consequences. Then some man comes into a new town usually too preoccupied with accomplishing their dreams but decides she's the one for him. He penetrates her defenses and knocks down all of her walls. She falls for him only to realize that she's put his dreams in jeopardy. It's only when he finds out that he can have both without compromising his morals and fundamental dreams that they can finally be together.
I think I am so scared of having somebody penetrate every orifice of my body, mind and soul...me, always being bottomless, carefree and child-like... would he always want to fondle me, yes...but what's the point of life if you just run from your fears...besides I love a good touch and tickle.
"I don't want Los Angeles I want you."
I love that movie, he comes back from everything he thought he wanted to what he needed...with her, making a life and having a greater purpose. She takes him back because she never really accepted the fact that they might not be together and trusted the fact that if he could just see what she saw for them he would naturally choose her. The gentle jabbing at one another at the end adds that gleaming smile to my face and I feel that longing in my heart....
I miss you.
Misunderstandings & Fuck off
Officially I start tomorrow
I know that I have to do this
I'm going to drink nothing but water & the organic green clean vegetable supplement mix...should be yummy...
I'll also be taking bee pollen, chia seeds and daily enemas
I want to see a drastic change in my appearance and find my body
Sexy and taut not bloated, flabby and cottage cheesy
We got into another disagreement...over sex
I'm at the point in my life where I will either find the right guy yesterday or just live a safe, sybian friendly, doggie walking (as soon as I get one) lifestyle where I will just be closed off to intimate relationships
I feel they are more stress than they are worth and I am aware of the fact that when I'm single I get lonely, miss cuddling, affection, laughing and the feeling that someone else cares about me...but it's never that simple, straightforward or quite as nice as it seems
I try and try and try again and so does he and it really could work but...it just doesn't
What is wrong with me?
Why don't I want it anymore?
He's finally been able to make me cum...the 3rd one out of 18 total sexual partners with Samantha and Eamon who was only just the tip, included in that list.
Urgh!!! Bloody life!
Officially I start tomorrow
I know that I have to do this
I'm going to drink nothing but water & the organic green clean vegetable supplement mix...should be yummy...
I'll also be taking bee pollen, chia seeds and daily enemas
I want to see a drastic change in my appearance and find my body
Sexy and taut not bloated, flabby and cottage cheesy
We got into another disagreement...over sex
I'm at the point in my life where I will either find the right guy yesterday or just live a safe, sybian friendly, doggie walking (as soon as I get one) lifestyle where I will just be closed off to intimate relationships
I feel they are more stress than they are worth and I am aware of the fact that when I'm single I get lonely, miss cuddling, affection, laughing and the feeling that someone else cares about me...but it's never that simple, straightforward or quite as nice as it seems
I try and try and try again and so does he and it really could work but...it just doesn't
What is wrong with me?
Why don't I want it anymore?
He's finally been able to make me cum...the 3rd one out of 18 total sexual partners with Samantha and Eamon who was only just the tip, included in that list.
Urgh!!! Bloody life!
My Heart
It's dark
It's cold
It once was whole
It still beats but not with the same heat
It's just another piece of meat
It was broken by you
I thought you were true
But you left me broken and feeling new
I loved you so much
And always longed for your touch
Oh forget it
I'm through
I've had it with you
But I just wanted to let you know
You've taken a piece of my soul
And my heart is no longer whole
It's dark
It's cold
It once was whole
It still beats but not with the same heat
It's just another piece of meat
It was broken by you
I thought you were true
But you left me broken and feeling new
I loved you so much
And always longed for your touch
Oh forget it
I'm through
I've had it with you
But I just wanted to let you know
You've taken a piece of my soul
And my heart is no longer whole
N
Note @ North Bethesda
1 divorce
2 divorce
3 divorce
4
5 divorce
6 divorce
7 divorce
Could there be anymore?
I'm only on #1 and don't want to have anymore....
... failures
1 divorce
2 divorce
3 divorce
4
5 divorce
6 divorce
7 divorce
Could there be anymore?
I'm only on #1 and don't want to have anymore....
... failures
O
One Night Only
Legs sway
Shifting in the breezes of the night
The endless night
Where anything is possible
And everything that was once forbidden is now
Open
Go
Roam
Feast
Eat until your heart is content and your soul is fed
Belly full
Mmm mmm good
Now you know what to do
Toss that fuck out of your bed
Who cares if he just gave you head
Legs sway
Shifting in the breezes of the night
The endless night
Where anything is possible
And everything that was once forbidden is now
Open
Go
Roam
Feast
Eat until your heart is content and your soul is fed
Belly full
Mmm mmm good
Now you know what to do
Toss that fuck out of your bed
Who cares if he just gave you head
P
Professor
Economics
The study of the world and how it works
You've taught us so much
& I'd like to thank you
With the touch
Of my soft supple lips
& tender fingertips
Do you ever think to stray
Lingering awake in bed
Oh how I'd love to feel you
Inside
I cannot lie
It can't be wrong
To want someone's mind, body & soul
Please forgive me
I may have said too much
Is it wrong for me
To need your touch
To love you so much
The feel of your voice makes me quiver
Just a touch
Do you know
You are too much
I can't take it anymore
but I must have more
I must have you
Today, Tomorrow & Forevermore
Economics
The study of the world and how it works
You've taught us so much
& I'd like to thank you
With the touch
Of my soft supple lips
& tender fingertips
Do you ever think to stray
Lingering awake in bed
Oh how I'd love to feel you
Inside
I cannot lie
It can't be wrong
To want someone's mind, body & soul
Please forgive me
I may have said too much
Is it wrong for me
To need your touch
To love you so much
The feel of your voice makes me quiver
Just a touch
Do you know
You are too much
I can't take it anymore
but I must have more
I must have you
Today, Tomorrow & Forevermore
Project Bitch
I hate seeing how it's become commonplace for people to delight in others shortcomings and failures.
I hate seeing how it's become commonplace for people to delight in others shortcomings and failures.
R
Reality Whore
I'm a seller
A seller of souls and dreams
Hopes and all of the things you wanted to be
Line up
Step up
Right here
You'll see
I'm the seller here to sell you & your privacy
I'm a seller
A seller of souls and dreams
Hopes and all of the things you wanted to be
Line up
Step up
Right here
You'll see
I'm the seller here to sell you & your privacy
Regrets
Thinking about it now I wish that I could do so much differently
Screamed yes instead of saying no
Taken any and every opportunity to kiss and hold you
Telling you exactly how much I love you
Tears well up in my eyes from the force of the memory
The way only you could light up my eyes
Making me grin from ear to ear
Oh
This mind of mine
It constantly reminds me of you
Thinking about it now I wish that I could do so much differently
Screamed yes instead of saying no
Taken any and every opportunity to kiss and hold you
Telling you exactly how much I love you
Tears well up in my eyes from the force of the memory
The way only you could light up my eyes
Making me grin from ear to ear
Oh
This mind of mine
It constantly reminds me of you
Replay
I can't think
I can't think about any thing else but you
And what you do
Oh what you do to me
I can't believe you can't see
Me
I'm standing right here
Just wishing you were near
Haven't I made that clear
Oh tell me, tell me what to do
To make me stop thinking of you
And oh the things that you do
I can't think
I can't think about any thing else but you
And what you do
Oh what you do to me
I can't believe you can't see
Me
I'm standing right here
Just wishing you were near
Haven't I made that clear
Oh tell me, tell me what to do
To make me stop thinking of you
And oh the things that you do
s
Sex
Hot & sweaty
Cool & forgetting
Bodies Twisting
Intermingling
Hot & sweaty
Cool & forgetting
Bodies Twisting
Intermingling
Sexual Frustration
Touch me...
Touch me
Feel me
Caress me
Barely touching me
Lovingly kissing me
Arching the sexual peaks inside of me
Kiss me
Hello
Hello...
Oh
You're too busy
Penetrating what you think happens to be me
Me
Who I thought you happened to see
Touch me...
Touch me
Feel me
Caress me
Barely touching me
Lovingly kissing me
Arching the sexual peaks inside of me
Kiss me
Hello
Hello...
Oh
You're too busy
Penetrating what you think happens to be me
Me
Who I thought you happened to see
T
Talk That Talk
The key to the heart said so many times...flung from the lips of so many women..."we just talked...for hours"...
It was how my ex had hooked me and my former husband.
The key to the heart said so many times...flung from the lips of so many women..."we just talked...for hours"...
It was how my ex had hooked me and my former husband.
Tears
I cry because I'm happy
I cry because I'm sad
I cry because you left me
And you never got to see
The wonderful woman inside of me
So I walk on
Never looking back
I'm getting back on track
Armed with my life and my mind
So I can once again be kind
To all of the men that have wronged me
And all of the men that will
Here I am standing tall
Waiting for you to try to make me fall
I wipe away the tears
I stand before my fears
And realize that I am wise beyond my years
I cry because I'm happy
I cry because I'm sad
I cry because you left me
And you never got to see
The wonderful woman inside of me
So I walk on
Never looking back
I'm getting back on track
Armed with my life and my mind
So I can once again be kind
To all of the men that have wronged me
And all of the men that will
Here I am standing tall
Waiting for you to try to make me fall
I wipe away the tears
I stand before my fears
And realize that I am wise beyond my years
The Endless Dance
As I tried to look the beast head on he kept driving me around in circles
Endless circles and the battle began
The showdown has commenced
Good verses evil
Or a little of both
They dance and move
Sparring battles
Are you ready to begin
This man
Oh this man
What he does to me
Sends shivers down my spine
Making me want to move
Oh how I want to move with you
As I tried to look the beast head on he kept driving me around in circles
Endless circles and the battle began
The showdown has commenced
Good verses evil
Or a little of both
They dance and move
Sparring battles
Are you ready to begin
This man
Oh this man
What he does to me
Sends shivers down my spine
Making me want to move
Oh how I want to move with you
The Intro
Sitting there she felt desperately lonely
She looked around her empty apartment and tears flooded her eyes
She thought to herself
Where did it all go wrong
She wasn't happy
She couldn't even remember the last time she felt true happiness
No love life, no real friends
The only thing she had left anymore were her dreams and sadly those began fading
She grabbed the glass, gulping the remainder of its contents
Jack was her best friend these days
He helped her forget the years of torment and abuse she had endured
All of those horrible memories replaying in her mind
These days Jack wasn't helping her forget
He only served as a constant reminder that the years of silence would never be forgotten and she was spiraling out of control.
She quickly poured another drink but seeing how it was going to be a long night, put the bottle to her lips and The contents flowing down her throat she remembered
The night had just begun and it was only getting worse
Sitting there she felt desperately lonely
She looked around her empty apartment and tears flooded her eyes
She thought to herself
Where did it all go wrong
She wasn't happy
She couldn't even remember the last time she felt true happiness
No love life, no real friends
The only thing she had left anymore were her dreams and sadly those began fading
She grabbed the glass, gulping the remainder of its contents
Jack was her best friend these days
He helped her forget the years of torment and abuse she had endured
All of those horrible memories replaying in her mind
These days Jack wasn't helping her forget
He only served as a constant reminder that the years of silence would never be forgotten and she was spiraling out of control.
She quickly poured another drink but seeing how it was going to be a long night, put the bottle to her lips and The contents flowing down her throat she remembered
The night had just begun and it was only getting worse
The Itch
I need it
I want it
You won't touch me
What can I do
I need to have
I want to touch
I'm going to kiss you
What are you going to do
Will you take it all in stride
Will you casually pass me by
Or maybe just this one time
My heart won't be telling a lie
I need it
I want it
You won't touch me
What can I do
I need to have
I want to touch
I'm going to kiss you
What are you going to do
Will you take it all in stride
Will you casually pass me by
Or maybe just this one time
My heart won't be telling a lie
The Kiss
I close my eyes
I breathe in once
Just to take in your scent
My lips part as I lick them
Drawing you near
I feel the soft touch of your hand
As it lovingly caresses my cheek
I feel you coming closer
You pull me in
Our lips touch
Slowly
Quietly
Soft and warm
Your tongue licks my bottom lip
My hunger for you is awakened & I devour you
I close my eyes
I breathe in once
Just to take in your scent
My lips part as I lick them
Drawing you near
I feel the soft touch of your hand
As it lovingly caresses my cheek
I feel you coming closer
You pull me in
Our lips touch
Slowly
Quietly
Soft and warm
Your tongue licks my bottom lip
My hunger for you is awakened & I devour you
The Mind
The mind is an eye
It will never die
It sees what's there
Sometimes it doesn't even care
It makes you believe in things that aren't even there
It operates the body
Moves the soul-
& makes me whole
The mind is an eye
It will never die
It sees what's there
Sometimes it doesn't even care
It makes you believe in things that aren't even there
It operates the body
Moves the soul-
& makes me whole
The Narcissist
You, you, you...
You need to be
With your hopes and dreams
But what it all seems to be
Is you
It's all centered on you
The world revolves around you
But what about the few
Who never even had a clue
That their purpose was only to benefit you
You, you, you...
You need to be
With your hopes and dreams
But what it all seems to be
Is you
It's all centered on you
The world revolves around you
But what about the few
Who never even had a clue
That their purpose was only to benefit you
The Signs
In the winds I sense a change
The past and present are being replayed
Obstacles that I've hurtled are still in my way
What does the future say
Move along
Go on your way
I'm moving on but I keep being led astray
Down the wrong road
A darkened path
Towards the river on a shifty raft
In the winds I sense a change
The past and present are being replayed
Obstacles that I've hurtled are still in my way
What does the future say
Move along
Go on your way
I'm moving on but I keep being led astray
Down the wrong road
A darkened path
Towards the river on a shifty raft
"She is more capable than most
She is led by love
The world moves for love
It kneels before it in awe"
The Village
She is led by love
The world moves for love
It kneels before it in awe"
The Village
TV
It's big
It's bright
It lights up my life
I sit here
I sit there
But I can watch it anywhere
I surf
I flip
I have no chip
Violence here
Sex there
It's everywhere
I love it
I need it
I just can't wait to see it
I love you
You need me
We definitely are a happy family
It's big
It's bright
It lights up my life
I sit here
I sit there
But I can watch it anywhere
I surf
I flip
I have no chip
Violence here
Sex there
It's everywhere
I love it
I need it
I just can't wait to see it
I love you
You need me
We definitely are a happy family
W
Waiting
Looking at you makes me see
Looking at you hoping someday it could be
Looking at you I see
All of your wants and needs
Looking at you provides the seeds
For the life that we will lead
Looking at you makes me hope
That you are looking at me
Looking at you makes me see
Looking at you hoping someday it could be
Looking at you I see
All of your wants and needs
Looking at you provides the seeds
For the life that we will lead
Looking at you makes me hope
That you are looking at me
Webcam
Details on her pleasure and the pleasure of watching
I logged on and feeling a bit naughty decided to turn on the webcam. The response was instant as I hand picked who would get the privilege of seeing me, feasting their eyes on the deliciousness I had to offer. I gave a pouty kiss to my audience some of which were already getting involved in the festivities. I felt so hot. Not only the thrill of being watched but also having the desire to watch and feast upon the nakedness sent longing shivers down my spine. My clit ached and throbbed against the crotch of my now moist panties as I licked my finger and smiled. Carefully peeling my shirt down to reveal a stiff chocolate nipple. I rubbed the freshly moistened finger around my protruding breast panting from the raw desire. My audience was getting close evidenced by their quickening speed. I aimed the camera at my parting lips glistening with desire causing climactic bursts everywhere that I looked. Logging off, I thought with a smirk across my face, give them just enough to have them begging for more.
Details on her pleasure and the pleasure of watching
I logged on and feeling a bit naughty decided to turn on the webcam. The response was instant as I hand picked who would get the privilege of seeing me, feasting their eyes on the deliciousness I had to offer. I gave a pouty kiss to my audience some of which were already getting involved in the festivities. I felt so hot. Not only the thrill of being watched but also having the desire to watch and feast upon the nakedness sent longing shivers down my spine. My clit ached and throbbed against the crotch of my now moist panties as I licked my finger and smiled. Carefully peeling my shirt down to reveal a stiff chocolate nipple. I rubbed the freshly moistened finger around my protruding breast panting from the raw desire. My audience was getting close evidenced by their quickening speed. I aimed the camera at my parting lips glistening with desire causing climactic bursts everywhere that I looked. Logging off, I thought with a smirk across my face, give them just enough to have them begging for more.
Welcome To Heartbreak
Brake up to make up to then break up...I think it was our 20th and now it is fini.
The fight was a blur but the words still resonate.
"Any other guy would be pissed off by now"
"I don't care about this, I have so much more happening in my life"
"I don't want to be with you anymore"
Brake up to make up to then break up...I think it was our 20th and now it is fini.
The fight was a blur but the words still resonate.
"Any other guy would be pissed off by now"
"I don't care about this, I have so much more happening in my life"
"I don't want to be with you anymore"
What Happens Next
Sitting there
Helpless on the couch
Desperately lonely
She thought to herself
Wherediditallgowrong
School was finally over
14 years of busting her ass and for what?
All of those years
In the classroom couldn't prepare her for life
The real world which was stifling her existence
Sitting there she realized she was alone
She had done so much and tried for so long
She wondered what had happened to her
Her dreams for a future that just seemed to be passing her by
Her life
In shambles
As she contemplated where she left the shattered pieces of her soul
Sitting there
Helpless on the couch
Desperately lonely
She thought to herself
Wherediditallgowrong
School was finally over
14 years of busting her ass and for what?
All of those years
In the classroom couldn't prepare her for life
The real world which was stifling her existence
Sitting there she realized she was alone
She had done so much and tried for so long
She wondered what had happened to her
Her dreams for a future that just seemed to be passing her by
Her life
In shambles
As she contemplated where she left the shattered pieces of her soul
Who Am I
I am a changed woman
I can no longer look into the light
When there is so much darkness around
Befalling my grace
Who am I now
If not forever changed
I am no longer the same
Sweet & innocent girl
Yet I doubt I ever was
Who am I
Because I feel like nothing
I yearn to see
Yet I have no eyes
I yearn to hear
Yet I am as deaf as they come
I have been hypnotised by the likes of this soiled soul
America
Land of the free
It's a fucking joke and everyone's laughing
Shielded by this dark cloud
Tainted cloak of webbed lies
I wish I never opened my eyes
That faithful 1st birthday
I wish I never learned the words
I don't believe you
Because fortunately I was educated
And am able to move past the ones who went along with the pack
Never doubting the unforeseen questions and definitive statements
Steeped in the stench that lies too pungent to forget
Yet too familiar to walk away from
I am a changed woman
and I hope and pray that I will never be the same
I am a changed woman
I can no longer look into the light
When there is so much darkness around
Befalling my grace
Who am I now
If not forever changed
I am no longer the same
Sweet & innocent girl
Yet I doubt I ever was
Who am I
Because I feel like nothing
I yearn to see
Yet I have no eyes
I yearn to hear
Yet I am as deaf as they come
I have been hypnotised by the likes of this soiled soul
America
Land of the free
It's a fucking joke and everyone's laughing
Shielded by this dark cloud
Tainted cloak of webbed lies
I wish I never opened my eyes
That faithful 1st birthday
I wish I never learned the words
I don't believe you
Because fortunately I was educated
And am able to move past the ones who went along with the pack
Never doubting the unforeseen questions and definitive statements
Steeped in the stench that lies too pungent to forget
Yet too familiar to walk away from
I am a changed woman
and I hope and pray that I will never be the same
Words Left Unsaid
His breath tickles the crease of my neck
As he casually brushes my hair
Long, steady strokes
So close yet I'm so far away
I love the way he touches me
My breath comes quick but slowly in
Smiling brightly within the confines of the room
The light from his eyes casts a shadow in my heart
Slowly
Wondering if he knows how much I love him
and want to take him in my arms
Showering him with the endless amounts of affection I am burdened with at the end of the day
If only I had kissed you good morning
Laid all day in your arms
Feasting in the splendor of your glory
Time is but a nuisance
Ticking away at the journey of our souls
and if I could spend forever in your arms anyway that I could
Well my darling
It would certainly be like this
Right now
Here with you
Christian
His breath tickles the crease of my neck
As he casually brushes my hair
Long, steady strokes
So close yet I'm so far away
I love the way he touches me
My breath comes quick but slowly in
Smiling brightly within the confines of the room
The light from his eyes casts a shadow in my heart
Slowly
Wondering if he knows how much I love him
and want to take him in my arms
Showering him with the endless amounts of affection I am burdened with at the end of the day
If only I had kissed you good morning
Laid all day in your arms
Feasting in the splendor of your glory
Time is but a nuisance
Ticking away at the journey of our souls
and if I could spend forever in your arms anyway that I could
Well my darling
It would certainly be like this
Right now
Here with you
Christian
Y
Citing References
If everything's already been said then why do people find the need to trademark words and phrases.
I learned English from my Mother & Father so I guess they would have to be 1st...but then I'd also have to thank who ever taught me how to read and the ones that taught them...if we continue down this rabbit hole I would have to thank those who invented the English language as well as Latin which would finally lead us down to who/whatever created each and every living thing.
Is this not given to all of us...indiscriminately...?... and people selfishly feel entitled to have to own something that was bestowed upon them as a gift.
It's a sickness going around.
Idiocracy at its finest.
If everything's already been said then why do people find the need to trademark words and phrases.
I learned English from my Mother & Father so I guess they would have to be 1st...but then I'd also have to thank who ever taught me how to read and the ones that taught them...if we continue down this rabbit hole I would have to thank those who invented the English language as well as Latin which would finally lead us down to who/whatever created each and every living thing.
Is this not given to all of us...indiscriminately...?... and people selfishly feel entitled to have to own something that was bestowed upon them as a gift.
It's a sickness going around.
Idiocracy at its finest.
Thanks f♡r listening...
zzz
zzz
